For better... or worse?

Human beings are funny creatures.

I'm pretty sure each of you had already come to that realization prior to reading that sentence.

But especially when it comes to topics regarding relationships and marriage.

Being at an age where you can probably flip a coin as to whether they are in a committed relationship, married or on the open market, these type of discussions occasionally rear their ugly head. Often I know when they're coming, and can prepare myself an escape route just before the rolling wheel of confusion begins.

Unfortunately, I was caught in this storm before being able to find a safe place of refuge. Yet, I kept my ear to the ground because many of the responses being given intrigued me.

Recently while chatting with several friends, of course the issue of marriage came up and everyone was asked their thoughts on a prenuptial agreement. A contract entered by two individuals prior to their marriage or civil union, this agreement commonly includes provisions as to the couple's divvying up of property and spousal support in the event of a divorce or the breaking up of the marriage.

These documents vary depending on what state or nation one may reside, but in most cases prenuptial agreements lay things out cut and dry for both parties, laying ground rules for divorce such as adultery and the guardianship of their children should their livelihood be at stake.

At one time, I remember when this was one of the secondary thoughts cluttering the minds of the potential bride and groom, instead wishing to place their vast amounts of energy on wedding colors and which of the Hawaiian islands they will be spending their honeymoon.

Boy, have times changed.

With approximately 43 percent of all marriages now ending in divorce according to recent numbers obtained from the National Center for Health Statistics, couples now must worry about not only whether them and their significant other will live into old age in marital bliss as well as whether they will be settled in the event of a divorce.

I can say for a fact that this generation's perception of marriage is much different from those in the past; all I have to do is look into my family line to see this.

Though my grandfather — God rest his soul — and my grandmother didn't always get along the thought of divorce never once crossed their mind. No matter what the issue was, they were going to come to a joint decision and run with it.

It was not something either of them believed in; those vows meant something to them. Those rings to them affirmed their belief "we are in this for the long haul... for better or for worse."

Somewhere along the line things changed. Visible from the opinions from several of my friends, a prenuptial agreement would be a priority should they decide to tie the knot.

I am no genius when it comes to this marriage thing, as each of you know I end up in the proverbial "doghouse" for extended periods of time (... don't judge me). However, when I got married the one thing I refused to do was sign that type of document, primarily believing it defeats my entire purpose of getting married in the first place.

Plus, for some reason it made me feel like even more of a dunce for proposing and buying a shiny ring; why do so when I'm already searching for the nearest exit out?

For some reason, the concept of working together has been replaced by the notion of "all for me and nothing for you." During marriage counseling, the first thing the Rev. Julius McAllister (now a presiding Bishop in African Methodist Episcopal (A.M.E.) Church) told me and my wife were money is the top reason why a lot of marriages fail.

Sure enough, a lot of the answers I received confirmed this. Take this quote for example: "I would have to get a prenuptial agreement. There's no way a woman is leaving with any of my things; she is going to leave with exactly what she brought into the relationship."

Can't argue, after all this anonymous person makes a valid point — why shouldn't a person come leave a marriage with less than what they brought into the union?

However, that concept does not work for me; after all, it took you losing something to jump into that type of commitment in the first place — yourself.

There are times I look at my parents' relationship and sit back jealous of what they have if not totally grossed out. The fact the two of them act as if they are still dating after all this years is something you don't see much.

I respect couples who have spent a significant amount of time with each other, using everyday as another day to show how much they love that person.

Today just happens to be my parents' 34th wedding anniversary, quite an accomplishment in a day where it seems to be the "in" thing to tuck their tails and run should a few things in their relationship go awry.

One day, I want to apply the lessons my father has used during the past three-plus decades, including how he puts up with someone so much different than himself. Men are from Mars and women hail from Venus, right?

Some of the things I want to use are his patience even when visibly annoyed, compassion and willingness to do any and everything even when it's not his activity of choice, and of course spend more time with her. You can never get enough of that.

My have times changed. Less than 20 years ago, he was the exact person I was trying not to be.

In not getting a prenuptial agreement we have at least one similarity, but not necessarily the one I want. My goal is to be as good a man and husband as I can be so that 32 years from now I can be saying the same thing he is today — "Thank God for a blessed 34 years with this woman."